PLEASE

Please, pretty please, will some kind person with a heart of gold buy me this One Teaspoon 'Eagle's Shadow' bikini top? I only want the top half, so that cuts back the dollar a tad?

MY MAN

I read this beautiful piece of writing that I had stumbled upon by a guy called Charles Warnke and thought I'd have a stab at a retort. I found the original sad yet moving, also.
It's essentially an Ode to the one that got away.

You Should Date Boy Who Doesn't Smile

Date a boy who doesn’t smile. Find him in the booth in the furthest corner of the bar, drinking his beer, looking over walls of drunken sweat, fingers playing whilst he considers if it’s been long enough since he last left for a cigarette. Pick him because he has that attitude that you crave for so much; nonchalant, blasé. Give him those eyes you use to attract attention; accept his pick up lines and laugh politely. When the night is through, agree to his offer to walk you home. Let him kiss you in the rain because that is what they do in the movies and when you reach your door, let him in. Forget making love. He’ll fuck you.

As days turn into nights, let yourself fall awkwardly and unintentionally into a relationship. You’ll find that you have similar interests like liquorice and reggae music. Make those shared interests a fort that you will return to any time a small shadow of doubt creeps over your mind. Don’t think too much and talk about things that don’t matter at all. Months will pass. Agree to move in with him. Decorate. Fight about things that really don’t matter like whose turn is it to empty the fucking dishwasher. Let a year pass unnoticed.

Go to dinner with him in that expensive restaurant you’ve always wanted to try. When the waiter brings you a glass of champagne with a modest ring inside it try to muster all the happiness in your body and push it into your face with a covering glaze of sincerity. Don’t be alarmed by the feeling of your heart falling out of chest and being stamped on, or even if there is no feeling at all. If you cry – keep smiling.

Let the years go by. Quit your job, have three wonderful children and commit yourself to the school run. Raise them as best as you can – no doubt you’ll fail more than once. Fall into a bored indifference. Let him have his mid-life crisis whilst you take up pottery classes or have book club meetings with your girl friends. Die, but only after you realise that the boy who didn’t smile never made your heart oscillate with any true feeling and passion, that no one will write about your story and that he’ll have died, too, with only a slight regret that nothing ever came of his ability to love. 

MUSIC III

Some more stuff I am listening to at the minute:

Foster the People - Pumped up Kicks (The Knocks remix) Possibly the four most attractive men pushed together into one band?
Phantogram - When I'm Small
Natty - Bedroom Eyes
Avec Mes Mecs - Human
The Glitch Mob - Warrior Concerto
Beyonce - I Care
Frank Ocean - There Will Be Tears
                     - Swim Good
Tyler the Creator ft. Frank Ocean - She (fucking amazing)
Jhene Aiko - Space Jam
The Zombies - She's Not There
Reptar - Stuck In My ID
Yellow Ostrich - Whale
Hoodie Allen - You Are Not A Robot (he is too cute)

WARRIOR CONCERTO

Bleurghhh - how the fuck am I supposed to give up smoking when there is shit like this being made?
Love.

Directed by Saam Faramand

- The man in the white t-shirt, though sometimes topless, I am head over heels for you my angel.

WHEN I'M SMALL

Some polaroids have been released from the Nobuyoshi Araki shoot and Lady Gaga - I love you so, I truly do, but what the fuck?

Adore her hair though. 

HOUDINI

Ok, friends - I haven't made a post in around two weeks and as much as I want have a full on rant and rave about whats been going on, Meet Joe Black is on and I've never seen it. Tal told me it was about a man who is slow in the head - I don't think she's actually watched from the beginning until now as she seems to only have just realised the plot line.
So, I'm going to do a brief post tonight whilst watching.

Firstly - the fandamily picked up* and went to Rhodes (a small Greek island in the south, very close to Turkey) for a double bat mitzvah. It was a really great holiday. I actually didn't get to sunbathe as I got sick and could only sit in the shade but it was wonderful to get out of London nevertheless. I ate like a fucking trooper.
*I realised after posting this and only then proof-reading once it was up that I did in fact mean packed up. My father, sister and I did not, under any circumstances, 'pick up'.

When we came back Tal had her 19th Birthday, which was noiiice. We went for supper in a really lovely Thai restaurant off St Christophers Place and then went home to doll ourselves up and head to Maddox. 

We gots her an Alexander McQueen skull ring from the new collection:

We went out to Camden the other day to get our nails did:

How SICK is the skull on Talz thumb?

Again guys, Pinkita in Camden Lock opposite the entrance to Proud Galleries - she is truly fucking amazing. Get your nails done. Now. 

Megan kindly took me with her to go see Wretch32 and Example last night at the itunes festival at the Roundhouse which was great:

Really don't know what to do about my massive crush on Elliot Gleave. 

Meet Joe Black is getting a bit intense right now so I'm going to stop writing and have a look for some nice editorials to show ya'll instead. 

ERASE ME

Amy Winehouse by Hedi Slimane:

R.I.P.

MY MINE

I love you, Sylva.

DANCE WITHOUT YOU

Ahhhh in a few hours I will be boarding my flight to Rhodes for a week of GTWNH.
Gym. Tan. Wax. Hair. Nails.
Found this online. Made me giggle.



"Here are some dating rules for smart girls who couldn't care less about dating rules!"


1.“Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution .” ~Mae West

2. If he’s not dating you, he’s not sleeping with you…. (see #3)

3. Unless of course you want to sleep with him.. then do you boo!

4. Being single is not the end of the world: it’s the most liberating time when you can do what you want, answer to no one and fall in love with yourself!

5. Sometimes sex is just sex; break it to him gently

6. We’re independent, pay our own bills, change our tires and still want to be held; vulnerability makes you strong

9. Liking a guy is no excuse to act bat shit crazy… be cool B!

10. Liquor & true emotion don’t mix… trust me on this one

11. Your Prince Charming does exist; but you don’t have to be Sleeping Beauty waiting for him to rescue you

12. Femininity is our gift; use it wisely

13. Don’t play hard to get, Be hard to get

14. A breakup does not equal breakdown. 

15. Avoid two things in life: cheap shoes and cheap men

16. Maybe you’re just not that into HIM

17.“A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime that still doesn’t mean she can’t have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones.”~ Cher

18. There’s so much excitement in getting to know someone… take your time.

19. Don’t settle for less than butterflies 

20. If he doesn’t support your shoe habit, it’s not true love.

THERE WILL BE TEARS

R.J. Shaughnessy is a photographer who is best known for photographing that Adidas campaign where they have that massive house party with David Beckham and Missy Elliot but here is some of his other work that I love.

SPACE JAM

We come from two different worlds but - there's only one us, that could make things easier.

And he said, you come from a different world but - I think I'm yours girl. 

HAPPY HOUSE

Hello Lovers.
I have returned home, drunk, once more from The Roxy and have this strange urge to write.
It is approximately 3.45am. I have had half a bottle of white wine, two double vodka and lemonades and a bottle of Diet Coke that Liza had some experiment with.
The music was surprisingly good tonight - either that or I am so plastered that anything will be pleasing to my ears right about now. In fact, as I type, I am listening to Ray Lamontagne - which you'd think would be a complete come down from a night out but I'm finding him to be utterly perfect right now.
Apparently it is going to be 29 degrees tomorrow so my plan is to go over to Primrose Hill and lay there until I am so dark people question my race.
I was a bit miff about the fact that there wasn't a large crowd going out tonight but to my surprise and absolute pleasure we bumped into a group of guys that I have not seen in forever. They were the boys who we used to hang out with when we were about 15 and it was really nice to see them again.
One of them said to me "Oh, you know, I've read your blog" - "Oh yeah? That's so great, what do you think?" -
"Well... If I didn't have porn..."
Really, guys? When I put up photographs or wonderful editorial spreads of beautiful women who may or may not have their breasts out, you don't see it as artistic, you go and have a go? Sweet.
Here's some more porn.

Bo Don by Alex Freund for Gravure Magazine: